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New Album Available NOW!

“It couldn’t be topped!” They said.

“The music industry ignored your first album” They insisted.

“Absolutely nobody listens to music ironically” They sneered.

Well who said anything about being ironic?

 

That’s right. Old Big Dick’s back* and he’s smashed it out the park yet again. Proving inequivicably that when people tell you about their difficult second album those people are moaning little “woe-is-me”, wet behind the ears, pussies.

 

It’s not enough that he’s a multi-award winning comedian, BAFTA nominated filmmaker, excellent actor, well respected playwrite, competent artist, kind and generous, a wonderful humaitarian and feminist, who has a rockin’ bod and an ass that just won’t quit (in a good way). He is also one of the seminal musicians of his or any generation.

 

Listen to this album. Cum in your pants. Then crank it up to 10 (which is the loudest FYI) and listen to it again to hear all the little bits that you were too stupid to hear the first time because you were too busy witnessing the rebirth of a legend.

 

The real tragedy is that Nick Helm IS fucking amazing and he doesn’t even realise it. You should be thanking him right now.

 

You’re welcome!!!

 

Nick Fuckin’ Helm

 

*Average sized penis.

 

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